don't talk about this place as if you know anything
this is the third world like this that tsukuyo has ended up in they don't let you leave without playing along that's why going in our usual way would be too easy
so if playing dress-up and getting married is what it takes to get back our captain, then that's what i'll do
i don't have time to let pride get in the way of that
It's not about pride, it's about protecting a woman's heart!
[ which will always be more significantly important for him to do, no matter the circumstances or atmosphere. this place may be a game to lady pheme, but it isn't to him. ]
( wow, zoro just came to make a friendly suggestion about a restaurant. how is this all getting turned back onto him? truth be told, he should have known better than to talk to sanji about anything at all. what is it about tonight that had him willing to bother? )
that has nothing to do with you
it's not as if you asked for my permission before running off to marry your woman
[ it's not as if they're capable of having a normal conversation. they'll always need to find something to argue about, and if they aren't arguing, they'll get into a fight, and if they're not fighting β well, then they end up doing other things that sanji doesn't want to talk about. ]
No, and someone was still mad about it when I came back.
[ not to bring up zoro's betrayal/spite/jealousy/whatever again. ]
if you're going to take that shit lightly, don't bother talking to me
( 'mad'?
a word like that doesn't even begin to describe how zoro was feeling at the time. granted, zoro knows he shouldn't have been feeling anything at all for sanji, as much as he hates him, but they should both know by now how much underlies the 'hatred' between them. to think it wasn't a mutual understanding but something one-sided, nothing more than zoro's expectations impressed upon sanji's form... does sanji not understand him at all? )
[ it's not that sanji doesn't take that entire situation seriously, but he's prone to being defensive (which seems to multiple by a thousand when the person he's raising his defenses against is zoro) and maybe he's the one feeling a little frustrated right now. because it's also not that sanji actually cares about whether or not zoro decides to get married (even if he'd pity anyone he ended up married to), but there's a sliver of annoyance over the hypocrisy in it, especially when it's meant to toss sanji's own significant values to the side against zoro's stubborn insistence that he always knows what's right.
maybe he'd also thought he and zoro were of the same mind in this, finally, valuing the loyalty to the crew first, only to be met with zoro speaking so casually about a life here β getting married, opening up a restaurant β and then summing it up as part of some big plan as if it could be that simple.
so, yes, better to just forget it.
even if he knows he isn't being fair either. not when they'd put everything into that fight before to address this thing between them without a proper description. because mad isn't the word, but zoro's always been the one thing he could never squeeze into a single word, not with the weight they carry between them β for luffy, for the crew, for each other.
it's this same thing that allowed for the events in the carriage to even happen at all. because there's a complexity to it, layers beyond 'mad' and 'hate' and 'betrayal' and 'loyalty', which don't carry any single word or a thousand.
and it's all of this that keeps spinning in his thoughts after his Fine because, no, it's not fine, and damn it, why the hell does that idiot always find a way to stay so persistently in his head??
so, eventually, when he's had the chance to let the immediate fumes fizzle out, ]
Even if it's just to play by the rules, you shouldn't have to throw yourself into doing things if your heart's not in it. When I thought I had to get married for the sake of doing right for the crew, I was wrong and I ended up miserable for it.
( like tsukuyo, this isn't zoro's first time in a land apart from the blue sea, in a world where no one's even heard of the all blue, or the grand line, or devil fruits, or anything else from back home. last time, zoro was fortunate enough to show up in that place with the majority of his crew, Luffy included, so nothing felt out of place. even if they were in a world completely different from their own, Luffy made it feel like just another adventure, and zoro had no cause for concern.
now, Luffy isn't here, and zoro's counting the days [fifty-six at present] until he shows up here, or zoro shows up there, or some third option that his mind isn't capable of considering, like maybe they all show up in a new place altogether and Strawhats are reunited as one again.
until then, zoro has no choice but to do his best, and that includes things like keeping sanji in line.
if/when luffy arrives here, he wouldn't want to see either of them miserable. he wouldn't want sanji to miss out on the things that make him happy, like women, or dances, or a restaurant, if he has the opportunity for it. like hell is zoro asking sanji to turn his back on the crew by making their lives here something permanent. a thought like that could never fit into his mind. but, until things are back how they should be, zoro doesn't want to see sanji holding back.
...
so how did they end up back here? ever since sanji arrived in this place, it's as if all roads lead back to this, and them, and who they are, and what they're meant to be to one another. there are times where zoro's certain they understand each other as protectors, as the ones who stand up and take the hits, in a way that no one else ever could, but then there are also moments, like this one, where zoro is left doubting everything he ever thought he knew of the cook. did he just imagine those years of camaraderie?
weeks have passed between what happened in the carriage, and neither of them have made the effort to speak on it. have they come to a silent agreement that nothing happened? is zoro alone in seeing that moment as another part of the complicated dichotomy that makes up who they are?
he shouldn't be relieved to get something more than 'fine,' but he is. )
no it's not
( ... )
she's more than
( ... )
come over don't want to do it like this
( talk about it, her, by just typing letters. it's too reductive, even if he doubts he'll be able to do much more with his actual words. )
[ why does this keep happening? ever since he's shown up in this place, finding zoro in his company, they seem to stumble into saying the kinds of things they'd normally leave entirely unspoken, left either to interpretation or the assumption that none of it exists at all. it was supposed to be a lot easier that way, to let themselves speak through nothing but a fight.
but now words seem to be inviting themselves into forcibly being used to describe whatever the hell it is that goes on between them. if it's talking about women, sanji would have no problem coming up with a lengthy overly descriptive poem to describe his thoughts, his values, his feelings about them, but when the topic becomes anything to zoro, he finds himself stumbling to box it into anything that's verbal language beyond a plethora of insults.
and if he's terrible at it, zoro's typically much worse. which is why it's not entirely a surprise when the messages he gets are a jumbled pattern of incomplete sentences.
it might be a mistake, doing this talking thing, but β ]
Where are you?
And don't give me a shitty map. I'm not gonna spend the next five hours trying to find you.
( rather than draw a map, zoro sends over a photograph of the schedule he'd gotten upon first arriving here. it shows his classes, his learning outcome, and... the part where his room number is within the west hall is inconveniently covered by a glare of candlelight from somewhere in the room. it's hard to tell if that's a 1, or an 11, or a series of l's... )
no one's asking you to five hours is too long to wait around for your sorry ass
[ β why the hell does he always have to make his life so much harder? ]
If you can't tell me the room number, at least tie a damn shirt or something around the door handle so I know it's yours. I'm not knocking on everyone's rooms to find you.
why the hell do i have to be the one to do extra work??
do you want to talk to me or not???
( but, fine, whatever, zoro's signature bandana will be hanging from the front of his door by the time sanji comes around. dumb curly-brow can't even find a room without zoro's help... )
Stop bitching when you just have to wait there while I go looking for you, you bastard.
[ which is the last sanji will say on that, hoping that zoro could at least follow some simple directions to save both of them a lot of time. it does take a bit of squinting (with plenty of mumbled swears under his breath) to get a better read of what the number in the photo could be, but he makes his best educated guess and starts his search from there, mostly keeping an eye out for something on the door handles that could narrow down his options.
thankfully, the hunt doesn't take anywhere near the lengthy time it took to find the boat, managing to catch sight of a familiar bandana in about ten minutes.
hoping zoro didn't get lost in the process of actually placing said bandana and slipped it on someone else's door by accident, sanji sighs with an exhale of smoke from the cigarette hanging between his lips as he knocks. ]
( how hopeless does sanji think he is? sanji makes it sound like he can't take two steps without getting lost or something, and that's just not like him at all. zoro's direction is fine; it's everyone else who has a problem.
still, if the cook really is on his way, there's no point in zoro getting settled down or anything. he shouldn't get comfortable if he's going to have someone over, even if it is his nemesis. instead, he should do the proper thing, like straighten up. he doesn't have enough possessions here in this place to come close to creating a mess, but he makes sure all his alcohol bottles are in a row, and that his swords look their best from where they're leaning against a wall. receiving gentleman callers, lecture one.
when he actually answers the door, his face is a bit red from a night of partying. alone. it's still a party if you're alone! why would zoro want to party with other people when his captain isn't here? it wouldn't be the same, so he grabbed as much alcohol as he could and shuffled off his his room to drink in peace.
so, appearance-wise, he really looks like he took five shots and then laid down for a nap afterwards, because he's got the imprint of a pillow on his cheek, and his fine-pressed clothes are all wrinkled. that doesn't bother him, though. he wouldn't have that problem if he was in his normal clothes instead of this stupid uniform... )
Don't think I'm going to be impressed because you followed simple instructions.
( 'come on in, mi casa, su casa,' is what that translates to. )
[ honestly, zoro could look much worse, sanji thinks, and he knows this because he's seen zoro at his worst and at this best and everything in between. though zoro still seems out of place in his uniform while sanji seems like he was fit precisely for it, he at least seems clean, even if sanji can catch a good whiff of the booze from the moment the door opens. not that he's one to complain with his own stink of nicotine. two peas in a pod, as always. ]
Not like I came all the way over here just to get some praise from you.
[ the routine weightless banter is a good thing. it's a sign that they're not as tense with one another as they could be. which means having a conversation ... could be possible. maybe.
he shuffles inside, his eye only vaguely gazing over the room, since he hardly cares about its condition. the fact that it's decently organized is more telling that they're without their crew than anything else, lacking stocks of food stored in hidden compartments for luffy's late night snack needs, medical books piled high from chopper's casual reading, knick knacks in clustered piles for inventions usopp had yet to create, blueprints for a new vehicle that franky would charge into battle, or pages of sheet music for new songs brook would hope to sing. the boys were always crowded in their rooms, enough for sanji to complain about it more often than not (preferring to bunk with nami-san and robin-chan, if he could), but it was home.
for being in his supposed dream paradise, sanji misses them more than he could properly say. just as he would never say that having zoro with him here helps ease the loneliness and pain of that distance more than that idiot would probably ever acknowledge.
but he'd never say that.
instead, he just takes a seat on the edge of the bed, pinching the cigarette from his lips to breathe out yet another sigh. ]
( sanji is here because zoro invited him and sanji turned up.
that should have been expected.
there's never been a time when zoro looked for him and he wasn't there, barring that time when it was exactly like that, and sanji was gone, and luffy and the others went off to find him. it's hard to think of things in terms of what's normal and what's not when sanji's actions upheaved zoro's sense of normalcy so abruptly. it's like when usopp left, sort of. nothing was right for a while, even when they had to pretend that it was. zoro could have invited him here and sanji could have disappeared again, ran off on his own, alone, against luffy's wishes, again, because he doesn't know luffy's wishes at all, and the last thing luffy would wish for is to see sanji trapped out of misaligned duty. how could luffy ever be happy with a thing like that weighing in his heart? how could any of them everβ
zoro's saying that's enough of that topic for now, since that isn't why sanji is here. on the one hand, zoro doesn't feel obligated to explain jack shit to sanji. on the other, as his nakama, there's no one zoro wants to talk to more.
he sits on the bed across from him, on his roommate's bed, [the roommate that zoro paid absolutely no attention to], and reaches for one of the bottles that still has something in it. )
I'm marrying Tsukuyo. And unlike you, I don't fall in love with every woman I lay my eyes on. She's the only woman I'll ever want, so this isn't just about getting us all closer to going home.
[ it's quieter in the room than it feels like it should be, because when he's with zoro, everything is about chaos and noise, about fighting at the top of their lungs, about groaning their frustration, even about being surrounded by all of their friends who happen to carry their own sense of liveliness.
but right now, it's just them, managing patience and willingness, an effort to understand, that sanji can hear the bed sink beneath zoro's weight as he sits down and even the breath he takes before he finally speaks out what's needed to be said.
for a moment, sanji wonders if he should be more surprised. but the hints had been there, from the moment annie had mentioned something between those two, to zoro's defensiveness of tsu-chan against his interactions, to the entire living situation that sanji had insisted he was somehow keeping in line by moving himself in. that part doesn't bring any surprise. sanji had predicted the marriage bit already.
it's the rest of it that makes him still, that keeps him staring at zoro in that pensive silence, brow a little furrowed to suggest the collecting of his own thoughts. ]
βthe hell do you mean by that?
[ he mutters, quietly albeit a little annoyed. cigarette still between his fingers, he brings up a hand, rubbing it against his temple as he closes his eyes, sighing yet again. he feels like he'll lose all of his breath with how much zoro's words and actions seem to keep drawing it all out of him. ]
he can feel the way that his words aren't enough to convey what he's feeling, as told by sanji, apparently, just not getting it at all. it's only because they're not those kinds of people. Luffy is the one who says what he means without fear, with his whole heart, no matter how asinine or genuine they might be. zoro leaves that sort of thing to Luffy, and it works out for him. their thoughts and beliefs are in alignment so often that zoro doesn't have to worry about his feelings being misconstrued. He's the sort of captain who understands when it's important, and they always understand each other when they need to.
for a while, zoro had assumed he and sanji were the same way. they both just get it, so there's no reason for them to have moments like this where they say it out loud. when did that change? was it before those years apart? after he left the crew? when he returned? )
What I do has nothing to do with you, so it doesn't matter. I don't need your permission, or your blessing. I'm only telling you this as a courtesy, not because I owe it to you...
So, focus on things that make you happy while we're here. I'll take care of Lady Pheme.
There you go again! Talking about permissions! It's not about that, you idiot!
[ sanji rises back up on his feet before he can stop himself, feeling that pang of frustration building in his chest, tight and swelling. it has to be for the same reason it always is, that anything zoro speaks about anything, it's only natural to feel annoyed, to want to kick that dumb face until it's unrecognizable.
except it's not, and he knows it's not.
his teeth are clenching tight, cigarette practically broken in half at this point. his visual eye certainly appears angry, that curly brow furrowed intensely, but there's a noticeable hurt in it too. ]
You can't give me that shit about permission and blessing when we're talking about you and then suddenly talk about what makes me happy.
[ of course sanji's permission isn't needed. he's not luffy. he's not zoro's captain. but it's not about that, it's never been about that.
and before he can bite his tongue to keep the next words from slipping out of his mouth β ]
You really think that I don't care about just making sure you're happy too!? Does that make no difference!?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
sanji being stuck in a city that's designed to make sure he finds the woman of his dreams would be the one declaring he's never leaving.
so why does this all feel like the reverse?
you shouldn't put your dreams on hold β what hell is with him saying a thing like that? ]
Where's this all coming from?
You trying to get me comfortable so you can be rid of me?
[ because snapping about it is better than getting sentimental about zoro caring about his dreams or whatever. ]
1/2
huh
i hadnβt thought of that at all
no subject
thatβs a pretty good idea
go open a restaurant and stay out of my way!!!
1/2.
[ never a chance for a nice conversation. ]
2/2.
But it'd be temporary. I'm not abandoning the crew this time.
[ it hasn't been too long since that was an issue. considering it's the very thing zoro had criticized him for in the first place. ]
And I'm not getting married either.
no subject
no one asked you to babysit anything
i was fine before you showed up
and donβt be stupid
getting married is the right thing to do in a place like this
if you do it to appease the pheasant lady, itβs fine
just donβt go back on your word
( heβs not asking for much. theyβre all free to do what they want so long as the crew comes first. )
no subject
A marriage is a promise! Even here!
no subject
don't talk about this place as if you know anything
this is the third world like this that tsukuyo has ended up in
they don't let you leave without playing along
that's why going in our usual way would be too easy
so if playing dress-up and getting married is what it takes to get back our captain, then that's what i'll do
i don't have time to let pride get in the way of that
no subject
[ which will always be more significantly important for him to do, no matter the circumstances or atmosphere. this place may be a game to lady pheme, but it isn't to him. ]
So that's the plan for you?
[ ... ]
Are you going to marry Tsu-chan?
no subject
that has nothing to do with you
it's not as if you asked for my permission before running off to marry your woman
no subject
No, and someone was still mad about it when I came back.
[ not to bring up zoro's betrayal/spite/jealousy/whatever again. ]
no subject
nothing happened.)if you're going to take that shit lightly, don't bother talking to me
( 'mad'?
a word like that doesn't even begin to describe how zoro was feeling at the time. granted, zoro knows he shouldn't have been feeling anything at all for sanji, as much as he hates him, but they should both know by now how much underlies the 'hatred' between them. to think it wasn't a mutual understanding but something one-sided, nothing more than zoro's expectations impressed upon sanji's form... does sanji not understand him at all? )
this was stupid
forget i said anything
no subject
[ it's not that sanji doesn't take that entire situation seriously, but he's prone to being defensive (which seems to multiple by a thousand when the person he's raising his defenses against is zoro) and maybe he's the one feeling a little frustrated right now. because it's also not that sanji actually cares about whether or not zoro decides to get married (even if he'd pity anyone he ended up married to), but there's a sliver of annoyance over the hypocrisy in it, especially when it's meant to toss sanji's own significant values to the side against zoro's stubborn insistence that he always knows what's right.
maybe he'd also thought he and zoro were of the same mind in this, finally, valuing the loyalty to the crew first, only to be met with zoro speaking so casually about a life here β getting married, opening up a restaurant β and then summing it up as part of some big plan as if it could be that simple.
so, yes, better to just forget it.
even if he knows he isn't being fair either. not when they'd put everything into that fight before to address this thing between them without a proper description. because mad isn't the word, but zoro's always been the one thing he could never squeeze into a single word, not with the weight they carry between them β for luffy, for the crew, for each other.
it's this same thing that allowed for the events in the carriage to even happen at all. because there's a complexity to it, layers beyond 'mad' and 'hate' and 'betrayal' and 'loyalty', which don't carry any single word or a thousand.
and it's all of this that keeps spinning in his thoughts after his Fine because, no, it's not fine, and damn it, why the hell does that idiot always find a way to stay so persistently in his head??
so, eventually, when he's had the chance to let the immediate fumes fizzle out, ]
Even if it's just to play by the rules, you shouldn't have to throw yourself into doing things if your heart's not in it. When I thought I had to get married for the sake of doing right for the crew, I was wrong and I ended up miserable for it.
I wouldn't want that for you.
no subject
now, Luffy isn't here, and zoro's counting the days [fifty-six at present] until he shows up here, or zoro shows up there, or some third option that his mind isn't capable of considering, like maybe they all show up in a new place altogether and Strawhats are reunited as one again.
until then, zoro has no choice but to do his best, and that includes things like keeping sanji in line.
if/when luffy arrives here, he wouldn't want to see either of them miserable. he wouldn't want sanji to miss out on the things that make him happy, like women, or dances, or a restaurant, if he has the opportunity for it. like hell is zoro asking sanji to turn his back on the crew by making their lives here something permanent. a thought like that could never fit into his mind. but, until things are back how they should be, zoro doesn't want to see sanji holding back.
...
so how did they end up back here? ever since sanji arrived in this place, it's as if all roads lead back to this, and them, and who they are, and what they're meant to be to one another. there are times where zoro's certain they understand each other as protectors, as the ones who stand up and take the hits, in a way that no one else ever could, but then there are also moments, like this one, where zoro is left doubting everything he ever thought he knew of the cook. did he just imagine those years of camaraderie?
weeks have passed between what happened in the carriage, and neither of them have made the effort to speak on it. have they come to a silent agreement that nothing happened? is zoro alone in seeing that moment as another part of the complicated dichotomy that makes up who they are?
he shouldn't be relieved to get something more than 'fine,' but he is. )
no
it's not
( ... )
she's more than
( ... )
come over
don't want to do it like this
( talk about it, her, by just typing letters. it's too reductive, even if he doubts he'll be able to do much more with his actual words. )
no subject
but now words seem to be inviting themselves into forcibly being used to describe whatever the hell it is that goes on between them. if it's talking about women, sanji would have no problem coming up with a lengthy overly descriptive poem to describe his thoughts, his values, his feelings about them, but when the topic becomes anything to zoro, he finds himself stumbling to box it into anything that's verbal language beyond a plethora of insults.
and if he's terrible at it, zoro's typically much worse. which is why it's not entirely a surprise when the messages he gets are a jumbled pattern of incomplete sentences.
it might be a mistake, doing this talking thing, but β ]
Where are you?
And don't give me a shitty map.
I'm not gonna spend the next five hours trying to find you.
no subject
no one's asking you to
five hours is too long to wait around for your sorry ass
no subject
If you can't tell me the room number, at least tie a damn shirt or something around the door handle so I know it's yours. I'm not knocking on everyone's rooms to find you.
no subject
do you want to talk to me or not???
( but, fine, whatever, zoro's signature bandana will be hanging from the front of his door by the time sanji comes around. dumb curly-brow can't even find a room without zoro's help... )
no subject
[ which is the last sanji will say on that, hoping that zoro could at least follow some simple directions to save both of them a lot of time. it does take a bit of squinting (with plenty of mumbled swears under his breath) to get a better read of what the number in the photo could be, but he makes his best educated guess and starts his search from there, mostly keeping an eye out for something on the door handles that could narrow down his options.
thankfully, the hunt doesn't take anywhere near the lengthy time it took to find the boat, managing to catch sight of a familiar bandana in about ten minutes.
hoping zoro didn't get lost in the process of actually placing said bandana and slipped it on someone else's door by accident, sanji sighs with an exhale of smoke from the cigarette hanging between his lips as he knocks. ]
Oi, order up for your shitty delivery.
no subject
still, if the cook really is on his way, there's no point in zoro getting settled down or anything. he shouldn't get comfortable if he's going to have someone over, even if it is his nemesis. instead, he should do the proper thing, like straighten up. he doesn't have enough possessions here in this place to come close to creating a mess, but he makes sure all his alcohol bottles are in a row, and that his swords look their best from where they're leaning against a wall. receiving gentleman callers, lecture one.
when he actually answers the door, his face is a bit red from a night of partying. alone. it's still a party if you're alone! why would zoro want to party with other people when his captain isn't here? it wouldn't be the same, so he grabbed as much alcohol as he could and shuffled off his his room to drink in peace.
so, appearance-wise, he really looks like he took five shots and then laid down for a nap afterwards, because he's got the imprint of a pillow on his cheek, and his fine-pressed clothes are all wrinkled. that doesn't bother him, though. he wouldn't have that problem if he was in his normal clothes instead of this stupid uniform... )
Don't think I'm going to be impressed because you followed simple instructions.
( 'come on in, mi casa, su casa,' is what that translates to. )
no subject
Not like I came all the way over here just to get some praise from you.
[ the routine weightless banter is a good thing. it's a sign that they're not as tense with one another as they could be. which means having a conversation ... could be possible. maybe.
he shuffles inside, his eye only vaguely gazing over the room, since he hardly cares about its condition. the fact that it's decently organized is more telling that they're without their crew than anything else, lacking stocks of food stored in hidden compartments for luffy's late night snack needs, medical books piled high from chopper's casual reading, knick knacks in clustered piles for inventions usopp had yet to create, blueprints for a new vehicle that franky would charge into battle, or pages of sheet music for new songs brook would hope to sing. the boys were always crowded in their rooms, enough for sanji to complain about it more often than not (preferring to bunk with nami-san and robin-chan, if he could), but it was home.
for being in his supposed dream paradise, sanji misses them more than he could properly say. just as he would never say that having zoro with him here helps ease the loneliness and pain of that distance more than that idiot would probably ever acknowledge.
but he'd never say that.
instead, he just takes a seat on the edge of the bed, pinching the cigarette from his lips to breathe out yet another sigh. ]
Alright. I'm here.
no subject
( sanji is here because zoro invited him and sanji turned up.
that should have been expected.
there's never been a time when zoro looked for him and he wasn't there, barring that time when it was exactly like that, and sanji was gone, and luffy and the others went off to find him. it's hard to think of things in terms of what's normal and what's not when sanji's actions upheaved zoro's sense of normalcy so abruptly. it's like when usopp left, sort of. nothing was right for a while, even when they had to pretend that it was. zoro could have invited him here and sanji could have disappeared again, ran off on his own, alone, against luffy's wishes, again, because he doesn't know luffy's wishes at all, and the last thing luffy would wish for is to see sanji trapped out of misaligned duty. how could luffy ever be happy with a thing like that weighing in his heart? how could any of them everβ
zoro's saying that's enough of that topic for now, since that isn't why sanji is here. on the one hand, zoro doesn't feel obligated to explain jack shit to sanji. on the other, as his nakama, there's no one zoro wants to talk to more.
he sits on the bed across from him, on his roommate's bed, [the roommate that zoro paid absolutely no attention to], and reaches for one of the bottles that still has something in it. )
I'm marrying Tsukuyo. And unlike you, I don't fall in love with every woman I lay my eyes on. She's the only woman I'll ever want, so this isn't just about getting us all closer to going home.
...
It shouldn't make a difference to you regardless.
no subject
but right now, it's just them, managing patience and willingness, an effort to understand, that sanji can hear the bed sink beneath zoro's weight as he sits down and even the breath he takes before he finally speaks out what's needed to be said.
for a moment, sanji wonders if he should be more surprised. but the hints had been there, from the moment annie had mentioned something between those two, to zoro's defensiveness of tsu-chan against his interactions, to the entire living situation that sanji had insisted he was somehow keeping in line by moving himself in. that part doesn't bring any surprise. sanji had predicted the marriage bit already.
it's the rest of it that makes him still, that keeps him staring at zoro in that pensive silence, brow a little furrowed to suggest the collecting of his own thoughts. ]
βthe hell do you mean by that?
[ he mutters, quietly albeit a little annoyed. cigarette still between his fingers, he brings up a hand, rubbing it against his temple as he closes his eyes, sighing yet again. he feels like he'll lose all of his breath with how much zoro's words and actions seem to keep drawing it all out of him. ]
Of course it makes a difference.
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( zoro is hopeless at this.
he can feel the way that his words aren't enough to convey what he's feeling, as told by sanji, apparently, just not getting it at all. it's only because they're not those kinds of people. Luffy is the one who says what he means without fear, with his whole heart, no matter how asinine or genuine they might be. zoro leaves that sort of thing to Luffy, and it works out for him. their thoughts and beliefs are in alignment so often that zoro doesn't have to worry about his feelings being misconstrued. He's the sort of captain who understands when it's important, and they always understand each other when they need to.
for a while, zoro had assumed he and sanji were the same way. they both just get it, so there's no reason for them to have moments like this where they say it out loud. when did that change? was it before those years apart? after he left the crew? when he returned? )
What I do has nothing to do with you, so it doesn't matter. I don't need your permission, or your blessing. I'm only telling you this as a courtesy, not because I owe it to you...
So, focus on things that make you happy while we're here. I'll take care of Lady Pheme.
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[ sanji rises back up on his feet before he can stop himself, feeling that pang of frustration building in his chest, tight and swelling. it has to be for the same reason it always is, that anything zoro speaks about anything, it's only natural to feel annoyed, to want to kick that dumb face until it's unrecognizable.
except it's not, and he knows it's not.
his teeth are clenching tight, cigarette practically broken in half at this point. his visual eye certainly appears angry, that curly brow furrowed intensely, but there's a noticeable hurt in it too. ]
You can't give me that shit about permission and blessing when we're talking about you and then suddenly talk about what makes me happy.
[ of course sanji's permission isn't needed. he's not luffy. he's not zoro's captain. but it's not about that, it's never been about that.
and before he can bite his tongue to keep the next words from slipping out of his mouth β ]
You really think that I don't care about just making sure you're happy too!? Does that make no difference!?
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