( the ship itself isn't anywhere near the size of the sunny, or even merry. it's not a pirating ship, but some kind of battleship made tame. compact, dangerous, full of rooms in need of TLC. and sanji sure is taking his sweet time to get here and check them all out, which means zoro has time to ponder things he generally doesn't like to waste time thinking about. sitting on the deck of the ship, he contemplates drinking beforehand, but decides it's better to be clear-headed if this ends up being the day he actually, finally, really-truly kills sanji.
...
as if he really wants that.
for one, luffy would never forgive him for killing their cook. he'd be beside himself, and zoro can't be responsible for a thing like that. that's the only [only!!] reason he hasn't cut sanji down before: because his captain needs him. everything zoro does, he does for luffy. it's not like zoro needs him. zoro will eat anything; it doesn't have to come from that chef's hands.
while he waits, he flicks his swords from their sheathes and replaces them. over and over, lost in his own thoughts, until he catches a glaring, swirly-browed eye in the reflection of one. it's all the warning he gets before a purple-booted foot comes sailing his way, and he barely has time to block it with the flat of shusui as he leaps to his feet. with the way her leg extends to kick at zoro again and again, her maid's dress should be flying all over and giving people eyefuls, but magically it stays modestly in place. her long hair covers half of her face, but the half that isn't shaded in blonde looks furious. )
You've got a shitty caller down on the deck waiting for you! What the hell are you doing, wasting your time like this?! Be a good host for once and accept his call, moron!
Shut up! I've had enough out of you already!
Is that any way to talk to a lady, stupid marimo?! Accept his call and receive him properly! Do you think you're in any position to turn down a proposal?!
I said shut up! I'm not putting up with any more of this stupid courting—!
( the flurry of blades, and kicks, and whipping blonde hair gets disrupted when a fucking anchor comes flying towards zoro. he deflects it by batting it towards the dock, right at sanji, either accidentally or on purpose. )
Receive him, shithead!
Fine!
( he peers over the ledge of the ship, where sanji hopefully has been flattened to a pancake. )
COME GET TEA, ASSHOLE!
What kind of shitty reception was that?! How do you expect to be wed with that sort of shitty attitude?!
no subject
...
as if he really wants that.
for one, luffy would never forgive him for killing their cook. he'd be beside himself, and zoro can't be responsible for a thing like that. that's the only [only!!] reason he hasn't cut sanji down before: because his captain needs him. everything zoro does, he does for luffy. it's not like zoro needs him. zoro will eat anything; it doesn't have to come from that chef's hands.
while he waits, he flicks his swords from their sheathes and replaces them. over and over, lost in his own thoughts, until he catches a glaring, swirly-browed eye in the reflection of one. it's all the warning he gets before a purple-booted foot comes sailing his way, and he barely has time to block it with the flat of shusui as he leaps to his feet. with the way her leg extends to kick at zoro again and again, her maid's dress should be flying all over and giving people eyefuls, but magically it stays modestly in place. her long hair covers half of her face, but the half that isn't shaded in blonde looks furious. )
Shut up! I've had enough out of you already!
I said shut up! I'm not putting up with any more of this stupid courting—!
( the flurry of blades, and kicks, and whipping blonde hair gets disrupted when a fucking anchor comes flying towards zoro. he deflects it by batting it towards the dock, right at sanji, either accidentally or on purpose. )
Fine!
( he peers over the ledge of the ship, where sanji hopefully has been flattened to a pancake. )